Well done, Blue Cross.
You did me in good. Six (6) refusals to purchase diabetic compression socks for my diabetes claim.
You want me to make a new claim for edema, consequential to my diabetes claim.
Sorry. I’ve got no more energy to give.
I’m done. And no way, would I ever even dare to ask for the hospital bed that you already denied me.
Today I had to beg VAC for a special veterans emergency fund to pay for medical expenses that should be covered. I had to provide 3 months of my banking expenses which – because I share a joint-account with my mother — I had to share HER private information as well.
Because Blue Cross denies me diabetic compression socks for my diabetes (it’s not a ‘typical’ treatment for diabetes despite being DIABETIC compression socks), I had to give up my dignity and share my private information and my mom’s, just so I can get a pair of $250 socks.
That was the proverbial straw.
I submitted it but – also told my VAC person, that I am now at the end. No more. I have no more fight in me anymore. I don’t care, anymore.
I have zero dignity left to give.
Thank you, Blue Cross
From today forth? No more. I’m not seeking any more treatment of any kind, any more, for anything. I’m no longer looking for answers. I have one more medical appointment coming up that I’ve been begging for forever, but – aside from that? Nothing.
I barely eat anymore.
I barely move anymore.
I barely keep my eyes open most of the day.
What I am living with, going through, is not normal. I’m tired of the gaslighting.
The only thing honestly at this point that I can do? Is look to see where I can pre-pay an autopsy so that at least when I am gone, my mom can have the answers.
No doctor can find it while I am alive because there are no fucking doctors available. ER docs can’t do anything for me. I don’t have a family doctor. A pain clinic is at least two years away still. And there is no way on God’s green earth, I can wait that long…. so at the very fucking least, when I am gone, I hope an autopsy done by professionals, can locate what is wrong with me.
Why still look? Because my mom deserves to know what happened to me… and the results can maybe help my brother, who is going through similar issues to me with his injuries as well. I am not the only one.
So, yea – my battle is done. I’m not committing suicide… I can’t do MAID because I’m not one of the lucky veterans to have a doctor… But I’m not doing anything to prolong my life either.
I’m beyond done.
This video perfectly encapsulates my situation…